I feel hollowed out this morning.  I stayed up late, too late, until the gray light seeped in through the blinds.  I had to fight to stay up that long, and I don't know why I did other than sleep seemed a little terrifying.  I think grading makes me feel this way; the never-ending stream of writing that was compelled out of students feels so fake.  Earnesty and good grammar are both rare commodities.  And I like these kids, as much as I say otherwise over and over.  To see them faking a voice, posturing for a grade, to know that I made them do it-- well, like I said, I can't sleep at night.  Holden Caulfield would hate my guts.

Add to this the fact that one of my best friends is moving away and you get one ugly feeling.